What's on my mind

One Big Ball Of Earphones #SeniorProblems

God will someday barge into my home the day I’m doing something productive today and congratulate me. I’m starting find myself annoying because all I blog about is procrastination one way or another. I got so much to do today and yet I’m not doing it because my teenage brain  is saying, “say because it’s yolo! You only live once.” But guys I don’t know why.

My life thoughts and plans are all conjoined like one big ball of earphones. The kind of earphones you buy at the 99 cents store and you don’t know whether they will last or not, just like my life. Which one is right? Which one looks pretty? Which one makes me look cool? Which one will change my life for the good? Will it be a waste of money and time? Here’s my long list of options:

  • Go to community college in San Diego,
  • or Los Angeles,
  • or my hometown,
  • or Washington as I want to live somewhere new along with my best friend.
  • Go to the university where I got accepted to Chico university 10  hours away,
  • or 3 hours away in Channel Island.

All I want is to be independent already and be far away from my mother as possible. But first I need to have a bank open and to do that I need job. But looking for a job is hard. *starting to miserably fake crying and worrying like a big weirdo in a soap opera* BUT I DON’T EVEN DRIVE YET! I don’t want to be like David Sedaris, starting to drive until I’m in my 30s. I got a mother who is lazy and sometimes i don’t know when is the appropriate time to ask her to teach me or not.

This is a saved post from a long time but still relevant today. Right now I’m sitting in my chair looking around the room and I see my room is a mess just like my thoughts. But really I blame that to watching Lady Gaga’s interview at SXSF questioning life.

Calling out all the teenagers in senior year who have no fucking clue what to do with your life, aren’t you kinda over told what you should do with your life? To all the bitches who talk about college deadlines constantly to friends, find something better to talk about. There are seniors who can hear you and it’s just an overwhelming thought to think about. WE. GET. IT. Your just so excited about college and you’re on top of everything but no just stop.  But yeah seniors, congrats to you because you’re making it out alive.

My wonderland consists of a world where I have nothing to worry about but only the limited choice of toppings on my pizza i can choose from, what flavor to get on my snow cone, what starbucks drink I should drink from my own coffee shop that’s inside my closet-mall, and the amount of dogs I want to cuddle with at night. (due to the fact that my mom doesn’t let me have dogs because she has enough already with me.)

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