Ask The Bitch Questions

1: tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?

Our music taste. We have so much in common. Plus the eyes got me.

2: what on your body is hurting or bothering you?

Actually, my butt. I’m sitting on the floor. It’s kind uncomfortable.

3: what was your last thought before going to bed last night?

I really need to study for my SAT. I’m such a huge procastionator. I’m really going to do it today… But later.

4: what are you listening to?

National Anthem by Lana Del Rey. It’s been so long since i listened to her. I know mostly listen to DEMI.

5: what’s something you’re not looking forward to?

SAT, ACT, finals and failing my finals, SAT, and ACT. Ah.

6: where do you think your best friend is right now?

Her house probably thinking of a better way of being a hipster. She thinks she’s so cool but she’s not. She’s a hipster. Even though she deny’s it. Like get over your self. I’m such a bad friend.

7: If you had to choose a stripper name, what would it be?

Giraffico. Get it? It’s a combination of Giraffe and magnifico, which is magnificent in spanish.

8: What last made you laugh?

Reading, Where’d You Go Bernadette. There’s a part in the book where their dog is stuck inside the closet and they can’t open the door. The dog was barking. But not scared barking. Playful barking. And Bee, the main character said, “Trust me she’s laughing at us.” Because they can’t open the stupid closet door.

9: What is your favorite word?

Swagever. With Emoji Diamonds.

10: Is the glass half empty or half full?

What the fuck does that mean? I don’t know. My room isn’t that messy.

11. If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do?

Read all day. Which book? I dunno. It had to be between The Fault In Our Stars or Bossypants. Actually, it had to be Bossypants. I want to spend my last day on earth reading a hilarious book about how Tina was misunderstood as a lesbian, Sarah Palin, and a weirdo.

12:  Who were you in a past life?

Omg good question! I’m pretty sure I was a lonely homeless guy in San Diego, with a beard but with a mind that can confused millions of people.

13: Describe yourself in one word.


14: Where do you see yourself in five years?

In college, blogging on this blog, and working at a bar.

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