What's on my mind

Lonely Problems

My life… Is a mess. In my own way. I feel so lonely right now. My best friend… I have no idea where she’s at right now. We were going to the mall today but she hasn’t texted me all day today and yesturday. I have no idea if she’s grounded or ignoring me. But grounded of what? She’s too much of a goody girl. She would never go rebel. Her definition of rebel is probably, I’m like totally going to upload a picture on instagram, tag them, and make them feel bad. She’s done it to me before. But maybe she’s ignoring me, seeking revenge on me. Since i haven’t been there for her in the past week. But then again i have been there for her Wednesday and Thursday… So i have no clue. I was really looking forward going to the mall with her today but she didn’t text me to confirm we were going. I even texted her like 5 times this morning. And now i give up. She hasn’t even tweeted or gone on instagram either. So maybe she is grounded after all. If she’s ignoring me, i’m so done putting effort onto this friendship. I’m also sorta missing Zayn. Ofcourse i miss him. Duh Daniel! Not texting or talking with him is so weird. I remind myself, shouldn’t i be texting someone today? Oh right Zayn is gone. Sadly then again good thing i don’t have to worry about my phone. One step away from carpal tunnel.  Ever since i blogged about him, we haven’t texted each other. I was going to text him today but then again the fact that we’re just friends right now, doesn’t matter to me. Cause when i was talking to him i was seeking a relationship. For him to pick me up like a prince and put me out of this misery. And live happily ever after like in the fairy tales. He’s been a huge role through out my blog and now i feel like i should send him the links to the blog posts that i written about him so that he knows how i felt. But then again i afraid he’ll think, wow what a weirdo! He was deeply in love with me! Creeper! But i really wasn’t. I just like to express my self through out blogging, deeply. I don’t want him to feel bad for me or something i just want him to know… Or do I? I have no idea. After all i am blogging about him. Just admit it Daniel! You desperately want him back. Now jam to Want  U Back by Cher Lloyd. So that you can relate to the music for once in your life. I just feel so lonely right now. I just hate that i have no plans this weekend… It’s whatever i guess. The last time i went out with a friend was with kelcie and that day wasn’t even planned. She just happen’d to be at the mall when i was going to. But my real last time i went out was with Zayn. I have so many hoes on kik right now tho. Jelous?  Out of nowhere, random people are messaging me. I might as well kik them random shit and blog about it later.

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