Fiction Friday

Talking Shoes

Do you ever dream of having shoes that talk? Ever get tired of Siri? Then today is your lucky day! I present to you PlayerShoes! Shoes that talk! All you need to do is talk to the shoes.

“Hey PlayerShoes!”
“Please call me Homewrecker”
“Why homewrecker?”
“Because im bad with love.”
“Oh.”
“Its A Marina and the Diamonds thing you wouldn’t understand.”

“Hey Homewrecker im sad.”
“Then fucking put a smile on your face or else ill make you trip.”

“Homewrecker im tired. Massage?”
“Good for you. Keep walking!”

“Homewrecker tell me a joke”
“How much does a hipster weigh?”
“I dont know. 100 pounds.”
“No an instagram.”

“Homewrecker be annoying”
“Who’s linda!? Is she your girlfriend? Huh huh huh?”
“Oh shut up!”
“Daniel and linda sitting in a tree k i s s i n g.”
“Okay you can stop now.”

“Don’t cry Starbucks will open in 3 hours. Its only 3 AM.”
“But homewrecker i need some NOW!”
“Lets go to mcdonalds then.”
“NO! Because then i wouldnt be a hipster”

Buy your PlayerShoes today! Only 599.99! Call 1800FUCKOFF

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